Ok. What's 'Martini Racing'?
- Rachie
That's when you get smashed on Martini and go running. It's like the marathon, but with more vomiting and running into walls.
- PDR

Oh yeah, I'm a fucking princess damn it!
- KitCat

I'm amazed she isn't an alcoholic yet. After all, she works surrounded by men.
- Anya

and now i've reached my fluffy bunny quotient for the day- what can i make fun of? hmmm....
- Little Bam bam

of course, at the time it seemed a bad idea to bring up the handcuffed waiters.
- Polgara

Anya: My stores are amazing, god bless them...
Claris: so going by the fact that you're saying god should bless them, I'm guessing they're pissing you off?
Anya: Yes.

Life sucks and I want the T-shirt!!
- Paksenarrion

PDR - I read it wrong for a second and thought you were in a state of Catriona. Her parents might have a problem with that.
- St. Germain

Ok, go ahead and tell me how culturally insensitive i am, but there reaches a point, when you have been working in a canned air building with no ventilation, that you must BEAT THE SHIT out of the team of Russians that REFUSE to bathe.
- Allyson

The angel on my left shoulder is telling me to tone down one little snarky comment, but the devil on my right shoulder just knocked the angel unconscious, or perhaps dead.
- Xanderella
Xanderella: Your posts assumes that we're not out partying with the devil on your right shoulder. The best I can offer is that we might can distract him with jelly shots
- Vanessa
I'm here and stuff, but dude. Do you really want me as your moral compass regarding a post?
- Monique

Nope. I have a virgin book to read. No, it's not about virgins. I know people who qualify, I don't have to read about 'em. It's a book with it's spine uncracked. *blink* Kinda like those virgins.
- Anya

Note to self: The weirdly religious are weird.
- Amish Boy

OK, this place is even scarier than psychologist mothers. I'm going back to bed.
- Seska

Of course, if Narrator told me to jump off a bridge, I'd probably do it. Not because she told me though... just to piss my mom off.
- RTBS

Oh, see, Anya? Yes. I just lay low around her....I'm like, "Respect, respect"...she can kill me, ya know.
- Robyn on Anya

sure, you just took a little while to respond, and I thought "oh my god. I offended Claris?!"
- Little Sister

Narrator I don't know if I'd use the word "wuss" precisely, but you know, if the skeerdy-cat fits, buy it a litter box. Or something.
- Closet Buffaholic

I just got a fifth at the bater. Narrator, you have experience with this, what happens now?
- Allyson
Allyson - Well, basically, your head will now explode.
- Narrator

this is getting morbid. which means I should probably cc Claris in.
- Little Sister
Gee.

Thanks.
(I think)
- Claris

Robyn: Feast your quoting eyes on this:

Anya: Oh, and btw, we need to discuss this foul habit of Claris'. The quoting. It's wrong.
Robyn: You don't mind if I quote you on that, do you?
Anya: *blink* Well, at least you asked. Go ahead. It's good manners to let you with such courtesy given

*lol* Few whores act as their own pimp. You're talented
- Robyn
I'm resigned now. If we're gonna do it, dammit, I'm whoring myself out for charity right!
and yes. you can quote that last sentence on the site.
- Claris

Robyn: *g* Life is filled with so many amusing possibilities when you're friends with Bronzers.
Claris: < sarcasm>
Yeah.

It's great
< /sarcasm>
Robyn: *g* We luuuuuuuv you.
Claris: I hate each & every one of you sometimes. In fact, I have another bout of hate pencilled in for you in particular the Saturday of President's Day weekend 2003...

Claris: Way to pack.
Robyn: CLARIS!
Robyn: *g* Can't I take the occational break?
Claris: yes, 'tis I...bow down & rejoice. *g*
Claris: I suppose...did you check with the union?
Robyn: *g* Heh. Yeah right.
Robyn: I'm my own personal union of one. Since I'm also management, it makes for a very schizophrenic situation during negotiations.
Claris: that could get scary....
Robyn: Yeah. And that's before the mafia gets involved.

Hypothetical conversation about something......from Anya's twisted mind...edited for content in one place.
Anya : Yeah, yeah, I know...

"I'm not going down that road again", says Claris. "No more person's name deleted to protect....well, me groppage sessions."
"Claris, when opportunity knocks, let him in. It's not like you want to marry the guy, but think of the sheer physical fun of swinging with his dangle. Hmm? Hell, ain't that a PBP Olympic sport or something? Get your practice in!" replies Anya.
"You. Gutter... OUT! The gutter is closed, remember?"
"Until the memo comes around, I'm taking squatting-rights in the gutter."
*pause*
"Wow. That sounds REALLY bad."
When Anya freaks herself out - you know it's a bad thing....

I'm beginning to think that a film called "A very boring film, wherein Michael Vartan goes to the hardware store and returns a hammer, because the handle grip isn't quite right." would still drive ticket sales.
- PDR
PDR Only if he decided to go back to the store with the hammer and suddenly realising on the way there that he had just got out of the shower and forgotten to put any clothes on or a towel around himself!
- Jipsy Girl

Ah, he was just really smug to Narrator. I'm going to pop some corn and watch this unfold.
- Allyson
Allyson: Pass the salt, please.
- Xanderella

I flunked the ass kissing section of orientation. Do I really need to snort in derision, or is it understood?
- eiddy

Hee. My imaginary boyfriend in my head is so cute sometimes.
- Vanessa

Liking curves is good! Of course, these are prolly Hollywood curves, which means, you know, speed bumps.
- Closet Buffaholic

Anya: BTW... I think I'm horrified.
Karen has NEVER seen Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Hell, if *I* have seen that movie then EVERYONE should have!
Claris: *GASP!* that's so wrong....next you'll tell me she doesn't know why the naked blonde walked into the bar with a poodle under one arm & a sausage under the other.....(Breakfast Club)
Anya: She probably doensn't. And you thought *I* was misguided in my moviewatching.
Claris: *sigh* Ye gads. no wonder she has so much damned time to redesing her site again (and again, & again.....)

Anyway, what's new? I'm given to understand that apparently there's a show on the air called "Buffy the Vampire Slayer"? Is this thing any good, or what?
- Psycho Sam

I personally like Barry Manilow. Howver, we all have observed the fact that I am insane. So that's not really saying anything new.
- Closet Buffaholic

So, this "name edited" chap, then.

Two rounds of sandwiches and a wicker basket short of a picnic, yeah?
- Catriona

name edited's at the bater? funny - because i've barely been able to load the bater all day...

...and they say prayers are just a placebo.
- Xanderella

..going book shopping with that man is like going clothes shopping with a gay man. Just when you think you've seen it all, he goes, "no! Wait! I know another store!"
- Claris

Anya: *yawn* Okay, babe, as much as I'd *love* to stay online for hours tonight... I'm gonna finish answer stupid emails "I've never seen the word fanfic before today. What does it mean?" and then go fall into bed. I may not even bother getting changed.
Claris: "What is fanfic?" oh my
Anya: Yes. And I'm serious, I *do* have a "what is fanfic" message in my inbox. My gut instinct was to write:
A) Were you born yesterday, too?
B) Fan. Fiction. Make an instinctive guess.

Why can't I say things like, "Basically, it breaks down to this: When a legion of bright, educated people from diverse backgrounds, worldwide, all consider you to be a drooling moron, maybe it's time to rethink your argument."

WHY? WHY CANT I SAY THAT?
- Allyson

Don't suppose you'll plead migraine so's you can bail early? Just cause we deserve to see your loverly face much more than that company does.
- Little Sister
I can't skip out...there's only three of us here today, I'm taking Friday off, and I'm giving my notice tomorrow....even I'D feel guilty about that.

It's about a 20 minute drive, then I figured 20 for the train....let me ask my boss if I can leave a little early.....we'll see.
- Claris
Kay, just don't tell her it's to see friends you won't be seeing any more for a real long time cause you're moving cross country. Cause that could be bad.
- Little Sister

Anya: Whatcha doing?
Claris: updating that site you like so much...we're up to 184K.
Anya: I don't have that on my favorites...not very fond of it....
Claris: well, you're not really in the group I'm adding right now....
Anya: Good. Let's keep it that way.
Claris: Remember that whole "pop pop pop" thing you did?
Anya: Bitch.

It's sarcasm and mockery people. If you are that fragile and can't take it, go post at the 7^th Heaven board.
- paksenarrion

You know what this is? It's flirtation! You're FLIRTING with him! You big slut!

...is he cute?
- DreamLurker
Dude. Am I? Okay then, go me! Yay me, I flirted!
Pity I'm giving notice today, huh? *grin* Since this is now flirting that will never go anywhere....does that make me a tease?
- Claris
Oh yeah, baby. Tease that boy into a sexual frenzy! Go go go!
- DreamLurker
Okay, so the fact you're probably not a good influence on me...we've been over that, right? *grin*
- Claris

chiquens : This amuses me. I have Spongebob Squarepants fruit snacks on my desk
Anya: That sounds vaguely indecent, you know.
chiquens : heh. I adore Spongebob
Anya: Enough to eat him.

You seem a bit confused on what constitutes a personal remark. Allow me to assist you.
- Kristen

What else can a good daughter do? A child SHOULD support her mother when she's expiating the guilt riddled on her soul." Ricki's on Sunday? Drive out in the morning to go buy schtuff. Okay Mum. If YOU say so!"

I love guilt. And my Mama. They are two of my very bestest friends.
- Anya

It's not as though I was gonna sleep anyway, I might as well help enrage fans & posters.....
- Claris
Go for it. And don't hold back on the snark.
- Vanessa

One of these days my karma is going to end and I'm going to end up living next door to a serial killer, but hey. So far, so good.
- Lovely Poet

And with that confirmation, can we just have it stated that the amount of useless shit I know off the top of my head frightens me?
- Claris

Claris: stop multitaskign & pay attention to me dammit! Did yo ulearn nothing from the pics from Vegas last year? I'm a fucking princess!
Psycho Sam: I can't help it, when I think Claris I think more "unstoppable death machine" and less "princess".
Claris: Goody.
Psycho Sam: Hey, that death machine thing is my highest compliment.
Claris: And yet....Alicia still dates you...*grin*

I'm so touched that when you think of Lucifer, you think of me....
- Psycho Sam

The job is nice and easy, some of the people are strange and deserving of a fatal beating. On the whole tho, good stuff.
- Godeater

Anya: Btw, I was reviewing your quote page, while waiting for the colour copier to finish printing. I've decided I'm not so pissy with you. You have a fewer percentage of quotations from me than say, Karen or Keri do. So, I can cut you some slack.
Claris: *cough* wait'llyouseewhatIaddthedayIleavenameofwhereClariswasworkignomittedhere*cough*
Anya: Bitch.
Anya: Okay, nighty!
Claris: Bye!
Thanks for the extra quotes!

Oh no, that wasn't modelling the lingerie. That was for the prelude to porn.
The above message is a futile attempt at revenge for the future quoting that shall be done against me.
- Anya

And I am NOT in any way, shape or form suggesting you make dates with guys in the car next to you; just saying Methuselah had taste!
- Ozlady

Hmpfh! I just get propositioned by pimps and drug dealers. You get actual job offers!
- Leather Jacket

Narrator I dont know about metaphorically speaking but I think you're trying to stir up trouble against Vanessa and I'm shocked and outraged.
psst Vanessa iffn you take away Narrator's pony can I have it? I'll name it Golden Hair and I'll love it and pet it and take good care of it. Pwease?
- Mr. Whyt

MrWhyt -- You WANT a dead pony? Is this some new Monty Python skit? Or do you have issues that really require counseling?
- Narrator

Narrator The Nessa giveth and the Nessa taketh away, so I'm sure should could take it from you and render it onto me in a lively state.
- Mr. Whyt

MrWhyt -- Brown nose.
- Narrator

Narrator rebel scum
- Mr. Whyt

MrWhyt -- Suck up.
- Narrator

Mr. Whyt :How exactly does one take care of a dead pony anyway? Would you get it stuffed and hang it on your wall?
- Vanessa

Vanessa I'm sure you could revive the pony if you wanted too, otherwise just give me its head. I know someone who needs to wake up with it in bed with them *cough*narrator*cough*

Narrator Non Conformer

edited to say: why yes I am hoping to get to 1000 posts before the day is through thanks for asking.
- Mr. Whyt

MrWhyt -- Toe-the-liner!
- Narrator

I think we should all get little ponies... Then we can spank them.
- Evalie

Narrator She who colors outside of the lines

Evalie Freak
- Mr. Whyt

MrWhyt -- You post about getting head and a horse and you claim that I color outside the lines? Mwahahahahaha!!!!
Edited to add:
Evalie -- Freak
- Narrator

Narrator Anti-Nessaist
- Mr. Whyt

MrWhyt: Uh, you're talking about pony heads and I'm the freak?
- Evalie

Mr Whyt: I'm not chopping any head off any horse for you. I'm willing to do a lot for you guys, but there's just some things I won't do. Mutilating dead horses is where I draw the line.
- Vanessa

Look all i want to do is recreate a classic scene from The Godfather and you people look a tme like I'm advocating the beheading of all the ponies when really its just one and thats plan B if Vanessa cant/wont bring it back to life.

Evalie Pony Molester
- Mr. Whyt

Mr Whyt: Sure, that's what you say. But could you really stop at one?
- Vanessa

You know, that pony is going to start to stink, soon. Shouldn't it be sent to the glue factory?
- Allyson

I see smell dead horses.
- Xanderella